Today is the third day my son is home with a fever and he asked for help with printing something out for homework. The printer was offline and as I worked with the issue, this conversation occurred.
Lane "Mom, I'm so frustrated."
Me: "Why Honey?"
Lane: "Because I've been sick for three days, haven't been able to go back to school and I'm getting behind on homework and this printer won't work. I'm SO MAD."
Me: "Okay, how about you let me work on the printer and you take as long as you need on the couch to feel the frustration and anger."
Lane: "What do you mean?"
Me: "Notice the sensation in your body, notice what anger and frustration feels like and stay with it, notice it's movement and if you want to make sounds, let that out too. Sit with it as long as you need to."
He looked at me with a look of 'hmmmm, okay, your words don't necessarily make sense but the concept is worth giving it a try.'
He sat on the couch and I heard sounds of his body moving and expressing. Then he was back next to me and the printer was now online and ready to print.
Hmmmmm, interesting. Thank you Lane for the beautiful mirror. What I notice is when I allow time to feel whatever emotion is present and wants to move, the more I experience the flow of energy moving within and in relationships with ease and grace. Emotions are not bad or good. They ask to be felt and move through with ease when I don't resist...just like waves move through the ocean.
Here's is a practice that works for me that you may try when you feel stuck and "offline?"
- Create space where you are able to focus your attention inward. If possible, remove external distractions from your environment. This may mean physically moving to another space or just closing your eyes where you are.
- Notice the sensations in your body and rather than trying to figure out why you're feeling a particular way, stay with the sensation.
- Notice where it lives in your body and notice the vibration of the sensation.
- Be your own comfort and invite compassion to support you as you feel. If this is a challenge, ask nature for support. You can lie on Mother Earth, lean against a tree, take a walk on a trail, lie in your bed bundled in a cozy comforter.
- If you notice thoughts surfacing, invite your attention back to the physical sensation. In the words of Dr. Joe Dispenza, "Where you focus your attention is where you focus your energy."
- Lastly, I will often play with the sensation, inviting it to move with gentle encouragement and tenderness.
- And notice what you notice.
Love, anger, joy, sadness, gratitude, confusion, ecstatic joy, shame, bliss, guilt, peace....it's all here. If you're interested in exploring all aspects of being, I invite you to join the Integration of You Community where we are gathering together in community on a journey of wholeness.
With love, Diane